I think writing is an amazing outlet. Don't know why I ever stopped. Oh yeah, because I sometimes barely have time to even breath. So a quick update: I finally got that job I've been whining about in my previous entries. I am that girl I wanted to be for the past few years. Finally got that Legal Assistant job full-time, making the ideal student's "big bucks," going to school fulltime, moved back home, spending time with my parents and brother, keeping in contact with my sister daily and my close cousins and friends on a weekly basis, half way to my December goal weight and October just started (right on track mA), enjoying the weekends with my dear friends, making A's in all of your classes, beginning the LSAT process, just simply living the life Alhumd!
Erum, listen to me. This is the best position you've ever wanted to be in. You are the best version of your self RIGHT NOW. Never, ever underestimate yourself. Life is good; God is great.
I've really self reflected and I think I'm ready for the next step to bigger and better things. I'm going to be 23 in January and honestly I'm just sick of the games. I'm sick of it, I want to grow with someone. It's time. And I'm not going to find it, IT will find ME. I am just done.
Few months ago, my life literally felt as if it was flipped upside down. Everything was torn apart. It was a terrible terrible time. Someone elses revenge almost killed me inside, but I didn't let it. I flipped this situation right back up to keep me standing tall. I am undefeated. This incident will never be forgotten for as long as I live, only for the mere fact that it gave me such powerful strength. I will never forget it. And when it came time for me to make a decision, where someones reputation/citizenship was on the line, I knew my Molah was with me the whole time. He guided me..took me to the right path. I knew right then and there, that I made the right decision. Many still don't understand why I made the decision I did, but there's logic that goes behind it and it is that bad Karma, is not created by a person. It is a simple incident that works in the opposite of their favor reflecting wrong they did to another previously. You cannot punish someone. You cannot seek revenge. Who are we, but human. We cannot play the role of any other higher power. This is between me and my God. Me and my Molah. That's all. I don't need anyone else to understand.
I pray that one day he, and others, soon realize what poison revenge is, not for the victim, but the one seeking it. It's poison for the mind. Change the mindset. It will only cause you harm.
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